Tuesday, March 30, 2010

God in the stripping business??

"Hang in there!" "Let go, Lydia" >I've been living in that dichotomy for a few weeks now...

This last weekend I went to Texas to pick up my beautiful car. It looks great and I'm so glad God helped bring down the deductible!!

With different things and "inconveniences" happening in the last few days, I am convinced that God is in the stripping business. Stripping of self, in summary. Just yesterday I was reminding a friend that all our possessions belong to God, we just use it and are its stewards. I had submitted my car like this to the LORD when I first got it. He took it away for a month and now it's available for use again--for mine or however else God uses it.
Well, yesterday my cell phone was stolen from the property... As Mam reminded me--if Jesus needs it, you should be honored that He took yours! So wise!

So I am being stripped of my former comfort, security, possessions, anything I might be holding on to except HIM. Such a heart-wrenching process! But at least God is in control and He holds me by the hand...

God is faithful. So let it be.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

"Patient Continuance"

Romans 2:7>
7 eternal life to those who by patient continuance in doing good seek for glory, honor, and immortality;

Most of last week was spent in serenity, enjoying the beautiful sunshine before the crazy snow storm on Friday, and searching for jobs. Who knows how many resumes and applications I've submitted, but I have a few leads that could go somewhere. At this point, I'm not even so sure what kind of job to search for...personal assistant? Administrative assistant? Banker? Accountant? I guess I could do all that, but I don't really feel practically prepared to take on "manager" position, marketer, or anything else with a lot of responsibility. I don't know...

BUT church today at Denver Community Church was great. Their Lent series is on "wilderness"> such an applicable topic in my life. I could relate to everything being said and even the plight of the children of Israel. I understand now how they could say, "We just want to go back to Egypt! At least we had food there..." Egypt was a horrible place for them and represented bondage, but 'at least there life was predictable and steady' >they magnified the good in the bad because they were in that transition time between Egypt and the Promised Land. The pastor called this a "liminal" season> in my words, this means "not anymore, but not yet."
Yeah, that's where I am.
Please be praying for wisdom, courage, and discernment. Thank you!



Monday, March 15, 2010

In Peace



{ That's me with all the business cards I've collected over the past 3 weeks with several dozen I didn't get...

Well, my trial week with the marketing company over. This morning, we came to a "mutual conclusion" that I am not the best fit for this company. I didn't really enjoy the job and I wasn't making as many sales as I should to perform well, but I'm glad that the parting was peaceful. As I mentioned last week, I just did not feel right about just quitting or acting in a way that would force the company to fire me. I know that I gave it my best last week and that truly the greater miracle happened in my attitude, but today marks the end of that chapter. I am relieved, but I am also able to think of a lot of good things I learned/did with this job:

--I was not in a cubicle; instead, I got to walk everywhere and be outside (this was especially enjoyable when it was sunny! I walked an average of 7-10 miles a day)
--I got to see a lot of interesting stores and meet interesting business people.
--I got to know this area of Denver really well by walking it. As my friend reminded me, "Lydia, you said you wanted to get to know Denver and that you do that best by walking around it..." so true
--I had some really cool opportunities to encourage Christian business people, testify to God's grace in my car accident, tell people about Jesus, and pray over businesses. I was convicted to pray more for the business that "threw me out" than the ones who thanked me for coming
--I got to smile at "no soliciting" signs. Who knows how many of those I walked right past and only a handful that ignored me or requested me to look at the sign as I'm walking out. Haha!
--I got to see stores and ancient mansions (now school) that I would not have access to as a by-passer.
--I got to spend mornings and afternoons with non-believing co-workers. I am sure I wasn't always the joyful person I could have been, but I am praying that especially my leader saw me as a different kind of person

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Songs

This week has still been rough. I just hate how up and down everything is> my thoughts, emotions, spirituality, feeling adjusted, etc. But God has been gracious. Often I feel like I can't step into another business door trying to sell office supplies, but the LORD has been giving me songs. Truth songs. And reminders of Scriptures I've memorized. Again, truth.

I've also been blessed with many friends to encourage and pray for me. I've been getting texts and phone calls from people reminding me of truth passages and that they're praying for me. what a blessing!

Please be praying about the job situation. It's very much in the air, but it doesn't look like it will be for much longer, since I haven't made any closes in a few days. Oh man. I wonder why God has me here.

Today I read from Acts how the kingdom of God comes through suffering. I would understand if tribulation would come just because you're a believer, but how much do we inflict on ourselves? How much is just "life"? I guess God uses those too, but are they so noble?

Anyway, God IS faithful and good, even when I have no earthly idea what He is doing or going to do. Thanks for standing with me.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Women's Young Life Retreat


Young Life Retreat! >My Dorm


This last weekend I had the privilege of going on a Women's Young Life Retreat in Western Colorado. It was so beautiful. The retreat came in perfect time, God provided for me to go, and He even protected us from doing another flip on the ice (this time we only went into the ditch). Young Life is a really cool ministry all over the United States that focuses on building relationships with high schoolers and later disciples them. The women were so welcoming, the food so delicious, the scenery so breath-taking, and the atmospherical warmth so soul-refreshing.
I even got to go snow-shoeing for the first time in my life and talk to another young lady who also just moved to Denver with her husband 2 months ago. The weekend was such a blessing.


Now it's back to reality and making big decisions. Please be praying about the job situation as well as the car situation. I need to much mercy, wisdom, and clarity from God. Lord, have mercy!



Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Ponderings and pics of the car

Well, things have been...interesting. Life is pretty rough on my heart, mind, and emotions right now, but I praise God He has placed my parents, siblings, and good friends in my life that are able to such a source of clear perspective and encouragement.
I still have to make a decision as to what happens with my poor car, but I've talked with the insurance agent and he has given me some good options.

Please be praying for much wisdom and discernment during this time. I'm really struggling with holding on to the end, trying to see purpose is what I'm doing and why I'm here, and feeling like I'm very unsettled. Sure, I just got here a month ago (it seems so much longer!) but I still feel so up-in-the-air. One wise friend made a very clear analogy for me: a plant that has been uprooted and re-potted first needs some time to get its roots down and soaked up before it can really start growing again and bearing fruit. I guess I want all the adjusting and "growing up pains" to PUFF be over and start getting involved with different things and people. Instead, I'm sort of frustrated that it's taking all of my time and energy just to settle down. Man oh man.

Well, here are picture of my car before and after the crash :) Enjoy!